Yesterday morning I was grabbing an English muffin and caught a television ad talking about Oprah Winfrey’s “No Phone Zone”.  She was asking people to log into her website and take the “No Phone Zone” pledge.  The pledge goes like this:  “I pledge to make my car a No Phone Zone. Beginning right now, I will do my part to help put an end to distracted driving by not texting or using my phone while I am driving.  I will ask other drivers I know to do the same.  I pledge to make a difference.”

The No Phone Zone website is very well done, with some interactive features that indicate how much texting and talking on cell phones can distract your driving and cost lives, including yours.  The web link is:  http://www.oprah.com/packages/no-phone-zone.html

It’s hard to argue with Oprah on this one.  It seems like every time I see someone driving like an idiot they are talking (or texting) on their cell phone.  There’s no question that driving with a phone is dangerous.  I have a hands-free device in my truck, but even with both hands on the wheel, there has been a time or two when my driving focus has been distracted by my conversation.  I’m certainly not blameless when it comes to good car phone sense.

It occurred to me that unlike the rest of us, Oprah could sign this No Phone Pledge without a great deal of personal inconvenience.  She probably works out of the back of her limo when she travels to her Harpo studio complex on Chicago’s near west side.

Oprah has struggled with “weight issues” all of her professional career.  I have heard my wife comment over the years about Oprah’s dilemma.   It seems that whenever Oprah is fat, it is OK to be fat.  After all, a woman’s identity is much more important than the shape of her body.  However, when Oprah loses weight it is suddenly the coolest thing to do.

As an admirer of entrepreneurs, Oprah is absolutely one of my favorites.  When you’re born in rural Mississippi to a teenage single mother, become pregnant yourself at age 14 and rise to host the highest rated talk show program in history, you’re more than a superstar.  As the world’s only black billionaire and the greatest black philanthropist in American history, she is one of the most admired and influential women in the world.

I never watch Oprah, but I don’t watch much television except for sporting events.  My wife watches Oprah a couple of times a year, so neither of us is an Oprah aficionado.  I do remember the occasion when Oprah gave a new car to everyone in her studio audience, only to take criticism when the gift receivers found out they had to pay taxes on the car!  Oprah didn’t pay the taxes for them.  Oprah taught all of us a valuable political science lesson that day; unlike public welfare programs, private welfare programs run on a budget!

Oprah dearly loves Chicago.  Last fall she went to Copenhagen to support Chicago’s Olympic bid.  Her friend Barack Obama went also, but it didn’t work out so well.  I haven’t seen her team up with Barack since; I surely didn’t see her out in Boston helping him campaign for Martha Coakley.  Oprah will never criticize Barack because she is too much of a lady.  But Oprah knows deep down in her soul that she is a proven PRODUCER; a woman of true accomplishment who has EARNED her financial and social status.  Barack is a community organizer, a narcissist, an elitist, and an unapologetic recipient of false entitlement (Nobel Peace Prize).  When a PRODUCER meets a LOOTER things usually turn out badly.  PRODUCERS seldom make a return appearance.

It’s cool to be Oprah!

Al Franken and his Favorite Radio Network

This has been a lousy week for Barack Obama, Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, and Rahm Emanuel.  That makes it a great week for the United States of America.  With the election of Scott Brown to fill the Massachusetts senate seat previously held by Ted Kennedy, the democrats lost their “super majority” in the US Senate.  This was also the week that bankrupt liberal talk network Air America finally “pulled the plug” for a lack of listeners and advertisers.

Later in the week, Nancy Pelosi informed the media that the US House of Representatives doesn’t have the votes to pass the Senate version of health care reform.  White House spokesman Robert Gibbs ended up admitting that the best approach is “giving this some time, by letting the dust settle, if you will, and looking for the best path forward.”  Can you imagine that?  The health care bill that was being jammed down our throats last week behind closed door meetings is somehow now going to take more time.  Thank you Mr. Brown.

On election night I flipped back and forth between the ultra liberal MSNBC and the ultra conservative FOX News.  Rachel Maddow, one of Air America’s first hosts, who now has a television show on MSNBC, appeared very uncomfortable as Brown pulled ahead as the votes were being tallied.  I think I saw Ms. Maddow throw up in her mouth.  Meanwhile the FOX people were gloating about the glorious future of the Republican Party.  I don’t know how uncomfortable Ms. Maddow was on Tuesday evening, but thinking about the Republican Party made me feel just about as sick.

Despite the setback that liberals (they call themselves “progressives”) have witnessed, they still believe that the main problem is that government is ineffective.  The man on the street doesn’t see it that way.  He believes that the problem isn’t how government performs, but the fact that there is too much government.  Citizens in Massachusetts told the democrats last week that they want less government, more liberty, and more of their own money to spend.  They want their businesses to be free from energy taxes, healthcare mandates, “tax the rich” schemes, and government programs that mandate which industries should expand and which ones should contract.

In his state of the union message on Wednesday evening, Obama will tell us how fortunate we are that he led us out of the financial crisis of a year ago.  He will blame most of that crisis on his predecessors.  He will say that jobs are now his priority and will tell us how the US government is going to create millions of “green” jobs.  Therein lies the big fallacy; government can’t create sustainable and productive jobs.  It never has and never will, no matter how much printed or borrowed money is thrown at the problem.  The way to create meaningful jobs is to allow entrepreneurs to keep more of their own money and let the market work.  Free markets and free people have created the greatest economic engine on the planet.  While government sets the rules for us, it should be limited in its scope.  When government does act, it should be to make markets more efficient, not to impede them.

When you want something to happen, you provide incentives, not disincentives.    How do Obama and his crew expect people to create jobs when they continue to hammer every job-creating activity known to man?    Wednesday we will hear more of the same charismatic nonsense from a President who is neither knowledgeable nor competent when it comes to economic affairs.  Obama and his crew are bonafide job killers.

The huge earthquake that hit Haiti this week only brought back bitter memories for me of a quake that struck the state of Gujarat, India on January 26, 2001 killing 20,000 people and injuring 167,000.  The Gujarat quake was 7.9 on the Richter scale, compared to 7.0 for the Haiti quake, but the sights, scenes, and sounds of the devastation were remarkably similar.

Like in Gujarat, building in Haiti were poorly-designed concrete structures that simply “pan caked” down, crushing most of the inhabitants.  On my hard drive I’ve got photos taken by some of my friends who quickly traveled to assist survivors of the Indian quake; photos of little kids’ hands sticking out of concrete slabs, mothers crushed with their babies; all of which look resoundingly similar to the images coming in from Haiti.  Those photos are heartbreaking.

No country deserves an earthquake.  Statements by Christian Ayatollah Pat Robinson to the effect that the Haitians “swore a pact to the devil” and are being punished by God are neither useful nor responsible.  I’ve never been to Haiti, but I’ve spent weeks and weeks in Gujarat.  The Guajarati’s are predominantly Hindu.  I have lived, eaten, and worshiped with them.   I know firsthand that God loves them as much as he loves any people on this earth, and he loves the Haitians as well.  Natural disasters are a part of the natural order.  Like floods, hurricanes, and tornados, earthquakes kill some people and spare others; there is no grand plan as to who dies and who survives.

Both Haitians and Guajarati’s were hammered by giant quakes, but the future for Haiti is much grimmer that that of Gujarat, which has moved on to rebuild schools, homes and infrastructure.  Gujarat is a state within India, the world’s largest democracy.  I’m not going to tell you that there is no corruption among politicians in Gujarat, but the place operates generally in an orderly fashion without gangs and violence.  You’re safe walking the streets of Gujarati cities.

The same cannot be said for Haiti.  For years Haiti has been rife with corruption, poverty, and anarchy.  Haiti’s natural resources were exploited by the French and it was ruled by Papa Doc Duvalier and his son Baby Doc from 1957 through 1986.   Both rulers ran incredibly repressive regimes, to the extent that the US government and most other nations cut off all aid to Haiti.  Since 1986 Haiti has been “held together” by a UN peacekeeping force and many charitable organizations, who hand out medicine and other needed supplies.  This has not kept Haiti from becoming a lawless place, run by thugs who loot much of what is charitably given.  Even some of the world’s most respected charitable organizations have given up on Haiti.  No tourist would want to visit there.

Before the quake, Haiti was on life support; now she is in critical condition.  Much aid will come to Haiti over the next few months, but in the long run, if Haiti is to become self-sufficient, it needs a non-corrupt, functioning government complete with reliable police and a good court system.  Only when law and order is permanently restored will tourism and business flourish.  Once the quake mess is cleaned up, Haitians would be wise to move on and quit dwelling on the exploitation and corruption of the past.  Ultimately, no country is better than its people.  0nly Haitians can save Haiti.

For the grace of God and the quick action of Dutchman passenger Jasper Schuringa, Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab would have blown up a Northwest Flight over Detroit on Christmas day.   Within hours after this “dumb luck” near miss, Janet Napolitano, head of US homeland security, proclaimed that “the system worked”.  Is she insane?  Why hasn’t she been replaced?

After finishing his vacation in Hawaii, a full three days after Abdulmutallab set his pants on fire, our Commander in Chief finally returned to Washington to declare that our airport security system is indeed flawed.  A couple of days later he figured out that we are in a “war with Al Qaeda”.

During his remarks Obama said, “First, I directed that we take immediate steps to ensure the safety of the traveling public.  Second, I’ve ordered two important reviews, because it’s absolutely critical that we learn from this incident and take the necessary measures to prevent future acts of terrorism.”  Blah blah blah blah blah.  Blah blah blah blah.  Words and promises and more words and promises, but they mean nothing coming from this man.  Obama will stand by his promise to make America safe just like he’s going to stand by his campaign promise to have C-Span cover all of the healthcare debate negotiations.

To add insult to injury, on January 3, 2010 Rutgers grad student, Haisong Jiang, ducked under a security “rope” after a TSA employee walked away from his post at Newark Airport.    The terminal was closed down for 6 hours while all passengers had to be re-screened.  Thousands of passengers and hundreds of flights were delayed or canceled, not to mention the fact that we’ve got a rope and a fat guy keeping the bad guys out of airport terminals.

That TSA is a failure could have been easily predicted.  What do you get when you replace poorly paid, unmotivated, private security guards with highly paid, unmotivated federal employees?  You get another bloated, dysfunctional government agency (TSA).  Why don’t we contract out our airplane security to a El Al, the world’s most secure airline?  El Al has adopted sophisticated interrogation, inspection and PROFILING; methods that make TSA look like Bevis and Butthead.  The last El Al hijacking took place in 1968, over 42 years ago.

There is an important lesson in the Christmas flaming underwear debacle and the Nemesis at Newark.  The lesson is that private businesses and individuals usually act much more responsibly and effectively than government agencies ever can.  The Dutch Government failed to adequately screen Abdulmutallab in Amsterdam.  The US Embassy failed to disseminate the warnings and concerns given to them by Abdulmutallab’s father in Nigeria.  In Newark, the TSA employee walked off the job allowing Jiang a few more romantic moments with his girlfriend.

Contrast this widespread government incompetence with private citizen Jasper Schuringa, who jumped across two isles of a wide body jet, smacked down Abdulmutallab, beat out the flames in his underwear, and dragged him down the isle in a choke hold.  Reinforced cockpit doors and vigilant passengers have probably done more to improve passenger safety than all government security programs combined.

Sadly, airline security is just one pursuit in which the Federal government has miserably failed its citizens.  Others come to mind including Fannie Mae, Social Security, Medicare, the War on Drugs, the War on Poverty, cash for clunkers, the TARP program, the Securities and Exchange Commission, Freddie Mac, and the US department of education.  Oh yes, I almost forgot.  Wait till you see Government healthcare!   The senate and house leaders will “hammer that one out” behind closed doors in the next few weeks.  The final result will be a thing of beauty!

Salyards’ Winter Companion:  12 Horse Simplicity Snowblower

This blog will publish on Sunday, January 3, 2010.  As I sit at my computer on Friday evening, January 1, 2010, our weather forecast for Winona, Minnesota is as follows:  “Tonight, clear, lows near -15f (-26c).  Northwest winds 10 to 15 mph.  Wind chill readings -20f (-29c) to -35f (-37c).”   Most of the readers of this blog are people who live in the mid-western United States.  As such they understand what winter means.  For at least three months of the year you experience snow and must wear a heavy coat, gloves, and a warm hat.  But Minnesota winters are different than they are in places like Kansas or Missouri.  There is a BIG difference between zero degrees f (-17c) and -20 f (-28c).

Especially for my readers who live in the southern United States, India and other warm places, let me tell you what life is like at -20 f (-28c):

·    Facial Freeze: When you go outdoors the small hairs inside your nose freeze in seconds.  As you exhale the humid air from your lungs and inhale the cold, dry air, your humid breath freezes on contact.  If you sport a beard or mustache, it will be ice-covered within five minutes.
·    Food and Beverages: If you leave your restaurant “take out” container or a beverage in your car overnight, it will be frozen stiff within 3 hours.  There’s nothing so amusing as a pepsi popsicle in the morning!
·     Automobiles: If you’re lucky enough to get them started, cars and trucks sound like creaking timbers when they roll along.  Every shock absorber, every ball joint, every latch and every fitting makes incredible noise as you go down the street.  Vehicles are not made to operate at twenty-below zero.
·    Outdoor Soda vending machines: Designed to keep beverages cold, in Minnesota these vending machines must also have heating elements to keep beverages from freezing!
·    Frozen Pipes: If you leave town for more than 24 hours, you better leave a house key with your neighbor.  Make sure the neighbor checks your home at least once a day to make sure the furnace hasn’t gone out.  If your furnace stops working, within 30 hours the temperature in your home will fall below freezing.  At that point the water pipes in the house will freeze solid and eventually split, potentially costing tens of thousands of dollars to repair.  I once had 26 pipes split when I forgot to check a property during a 10-day cold spell.   The only way to find out where the pipe “splits” are is to turn on the heat, wait till the pipes thaw, and listen for the sound of water running inside the walls.  You shut off the water at the meter, fix the split, turn on the water and listen for the water running from the next split!  It is a nightmare that many Minnesotans have experienced.
.    Engine block heaters: Some cars and trucks have engine block heaters that must be plugged into an electrical outlet at night.   The heating element keeps the water in the engine block warm to facilitate starting on cold mornings.  For example, almost all school buses are plugged in during extremely cold nights, as they have to be running in the morning.
·    Layering of Clothing: At -20 f, you don’t go outside unless absolutely necessary.  Any exposed skin will freeze within five minutes. The key to keeping warm is to dress in “layer” your clothing.  You are warmer with 3 or 4 layers of clothing under a light coat than one layer of clothing under a heavy coat.  Each layer traps warm air.
·   Winter Storage:  In the fall you must take paint and any other canned or bottled liquids into a heated room for winter storage.  Once a gallon of latex paint freezes, it is useless when summer comes.  This also goes for motorcycle and boat batteries, which will be ruined when unused in freezing temperatures.  While they may be stored outside, garden hoses must be emptied of water so they don’t freeze and break.  Potted plants must be brought inside to survive.  While you’re at it, you might as well put away the lawnmower and the grill!
·   The Vanishing Pot of Water Trick:  When the outdoor ambient temperature is -20f (-28c) or lower (this won’t work at temps higher than -20f) you can do the “vanishing pot of water” trick.  Go into the kitchen and bring a pan of water to a rapid boil.  Take it outside, line the kids up and throw the water up into the air (in a direction away from the kids).  As the water reaches the cold air, it makes a hissing sound and a cloud of vapor forms.  The water never reaches the ground.

Winter can be a lot of fun if the temperature is between 10f and 30f.  That’s when kids make snowmen and people go skiing.  On the other hand, temperatures of -20f are deadly and no fun.  Fortunately, even in Minnesota, only in January and February can such extremely low temperatures occur.  By the end of February, temperatures moderate upward.  Winter has a few advantages; no mosquitoes, no lawn mowing, no hedge trimming, and no loud parties on the neighbor’s lawn.

I hope this blog has been informative for my readers who don’t live in warmer climates.  You might wonder why anyone would want to put up with these winters.  You would be correct to wonder!   In a few minutes I’ve got to go go out into the dark, cold night to check the furnace at one of my vacant properties.  Burrr!  Anyone want to come along?